When You Can’t Let Go Stan Goldberg April 25, 2012 Grieving and Recovery 24 Comments Whenever I hear about the importance of letting go of the past, I think about a conversation I had with my mother more than thirty years ago. She...
Leaning Into Sharp Points: Practical Guidance and Nurturing Support (Video) Stan Goldberg April 3, 2012 Interviews Simon Singh and Stan Goldberg have a conversation about...
Want Enlightenment? Think Less, Do more Stan Goldberg March 30, 2012 Grieving and Recovery, Life 12 Comments When I gave a workshop on change at a well-known retreat center, one participant told me that this was the tenth week-long workshop he attended in...
Feeling like a 1960 Edsel?-You’re Just Aging Stan Goldberg March 1, 2012 Aging 14 Comments When I was in college I would take whatever I was driving and offer it and $50 to a used car dealer for anything that ran on his lot with a current...
I’m Different: Illness-based Identity Stan Goldberg February 15, 2012 Chronic illness 24 Comments How we view ourselves—our identity—is based on what we do, the roles we play, activities we enjoy, affiliations we have, the values that...
Saying Goodbye to Your Dying Loved One: A Tribute Party Stan Goldberg February 1, 2012 End of Life 22 Comments Excerpt from Leaning Into Sharp Points" Practical Guidance and Nurturing Support for Caregivers. One of the first things Dean did when I entered his...
She says “I have cancer.” Now, what do you say? Stan Goldberg January 4, 2012 Cancer 62 Comments There are 12 million of us in the United States who live with cancer and the number rises every year as researchers find new drugs to extend our lives. How will you respond when you hear the words "I have cancer?"
How Can I Be a Compassionate Caregiver? Stan Goldberg November 7, 2011 End of Life 10 Comments Caring for someone with a chronic or terminal illness can bring out the best in us. It's easy if it is someone who shares our values. But how do we show compassionate care for someone with few redeeming qualities?
Reflections From New York, September 18th, 2001 Stan Goldberg September 7, 2011 Grieving and Recovery 16 Comments “Daddy, please come,” my daughter said on September 11th from New York City. Together, we watched the towers fall. Me, from the safety of my San Francisco home. She, from an office building in Rockefeller Plaza wondering if her friend survived.
Of Course You Remember Stan Goldberg July 7, 2011 Alzheimer’s/dementia, Poems 27 Comments Of course you remember she says. It was your sixtieth, and we came from across the country to express our love. I don’t remember, I say. But...
Through a Sealed Window Stan Goldberg July 4, 2011 End of Life, Poems 2 Comments Originally Published as Steve & Mac Stan Goldberg North Beach Beat, Arts and Literary Edition, December,...
“Shoot me, Please”: The Right to Die Stan Goldberg May 23, 2011 End of Life 45 Comments He pleaded with me to shoot him and the request wasn’t figurative. He was my first patient as a hospice volunteer in San Francisco and I was forced...
My Brain is Fried: Inside Chronic Illnesses Stan Goldberg April 27, 2011 Chronic illness 37 Comments Many people believe that everyone lives in the same world. At an event, we all see, smell, taste, or touch the same things, and therefore, our experiences are identical. But when we crunch the information into something that goes beyond observations, unique worlds—ones we may not understand—are created.
Leaning Into Sharp Points: Practical Guidance and Nurturing Support for Caregivers-Introduction (excerpt) Stan Goldberg March 3, 2011 Caregiving “How do I do this?” he said. His wife was just enrolled in hospice. “We’ve been married for 40 years, but God help me, I don’t know what I...
I’m in Shock! But It’s Nothing Personal Stan Goldberg November 28, 2010 Grieving and Recovery 18 Comments It was the type of conversation we’ve all heard, and then thought, “I’d never do that!” In a small restaurant north of San Francisco, I heard...
The Good Death: Views of Academics and Trench Workers Stan Goldberg November 16, 2010 End of Life 15 Comments The earliest reference I could find to “the elephant in the room” story was by the wonderful 12th Century Persian poet Rumi. He wrote about wise...
10 Suggestions for Living: Advice from a Tibetan Hermit and My Mother Stan Goldberg November 1, 2010 Grieving and Recovery, Life 20 Comments In the 19th century, the hermit Patrul Rinpoche wrote, Be like a cow. Eat, defecate, and sleep. Everything else is none of your business. After...
Thoughts as You Approach Your Death Stan Goldberg October 22, 2010 End of Life 5 Comments How do we “know” something? How do we know anything? Our primary sources usually involve written documents or the spoken word, with information...
Choosing How To Die. Does it Make a Difference? Stan Goldberg October 17, 2010 End of Life 10 Comments If you could choose the way you will die, what would it be?” Many people cavalierly answer “old age” or “in my sleep,” as if either of...
What Makes You Think You’ll Live Forever? Stan Goldberg August 19, 2010 End of Life 3 Comments The opening line of the pamphlet was straightforward: Join us in a workshop where you will experience your own death. Six months prior, I would have thought it an interesting exercise. But having received a diagnosis of “aggressive prostate cancer,” it had the relevance of a guidebook for an upcoming trip.